Part 2: Learning How to Trust Myself (Again !)
I thought I was helping myself by setting unreasonable expectations for myself, because I was sure this was what propelled my success. While that may have been true, it was also the reason I felt empty, like something was not right, and lacked a true sense of joy in my life. While I experienced ups and downs like everyone else, and happiness visited me, I did not experience a sense of constant joy, which I knew was possible (at least from what I had read and heard from others!) I was hungry for more and knew that there was more to life than material success ~ I yearned for peace of mind, calm and confidence in my life.
Once I stopped telling my body what to do, and ignoring its calls for rest, food, sleep, protection and everything else I had dismissed for over a decade of my life, my body must have realized it could start talking to me again without a fear of being ignored, so it started to do just that. The whispers became more audible and eventually I could notice, moment-by-moment, what my body was feeling and needing because I became so accustomed to turning inward and listening/feeling for signs. This was ultimately the greatest milestone in my journey, as it allowed me to become more self-aware than I ever imagined was possible, which enabled me to develop a sense of confidence about how to meet my needs, because I finally knew what they were.
Coming Home: My Self-Love Journey
Although I thankfully never crashed and burned, close to my 30th birthday I remember feeling slightly unmotivated, overextended and ineffective. I remember thinking and feeling that there had to be more to life than working hard, being the best at everything and living my life the only way I knew how to and had all my life. I suppose, looking back now, that I was on the cusp of burn-out.
New Year, Same ol’ me on My Kindfulness Journey
Instead of new year’s resolutions, I am more concerned with setting intentions for how I want to be rather than what I wish to achieve, given that there are so many variables that account for whether we accomplish a goal not. On the other hand, I have learned, through my journey, that we have a lot more discretion over whether we show up in life, the manner in which we show up, the way we respond to situations and the effort we put in.
Thriving During the Holiday Season with Kindfulness
The holidays are exciting but they also can wreak havoc on our ability to be be intentional and present. I owe a large part of my sanity during the busy-ness of this time of year on the time I set aside to reflect on the true meaning of the holidays, so that I can focus on what really matters to me and my loved ones. Perspective allows us to remember the true meaning of the holidays. In this article I offer some ideas about how to tune in, be present, be intentional about where you exert your energy and make the necessary shifts to tend to your needs and nurture yourselves so that you’re able to really enjoy each day during the festive season as it comes!
Highly Recommended Kindfulness Reads for Children
As the gift-giving season is upon us, I have been receiving lots of requests about my recommendations for Kindful books for children. Instead of a usual blog post, I thought I would compile a list of books that my family and I enjoy, as well as those I have shared with clients and loved ones alike, which have been helpful and meaningful for us. Please share any titles with me that I may have missed so that I can add them to my personal collection, as well as share them with others who are on a quest like us to help raise and nurture a generation of kind, compassionate, loving and emotionally intelligent children.
Raising Children with an Attitude of Gratitude
Gratitude is more than just a buzzword or a popular #hashtag— which is why it’s no wonder that avid practitioners corroborate the plethora of research that suggests it has the power to significantly and positively impact the fabric of our social and emotional lives, including our health, happiness, personality and career. While research is clear that gratitude is one of the healthiest emotions human beings can embody, what isn’t so obvious or common sensical is how to teach and practise gratitude with little ones.
The Power of Language
Language is powerful. It is so very powerful. With it, we not only tell stories to others and express our desires, needs, and deepest darkest secrets, but we also tell ourselves stories about the world, and perhaps most importantly, stories about who we are and why we are the way that we are. With language we piece together the isolated snapshots that comprise our life, and create a comprehensive masterpiece—the narrative of our existence. For these reasons, language is clearly one of the most powerful tools and superpowers available to humans.
I have always been fond of language, and of communicating through the spoken and written word. But, it wasn’t until I realized, through experience and deep reflection, the formidable power of language, to change our moods, our thoughts, our behaviours and our very being, that I gave language more mindful consideration.
Just as words have the energy and power to help, heal and humble, they can also hinder, hurt, harm, and humiliate. In this article I discuss how language impacts our inner and outer worlds, and share some tips on how to help our inner critical voice become a compassionate coach instead!
Why Time-Ins are the New Time-Out
School is back in which means that stress, BIG emotions and challenging behaviours are back on the rise in many households. While Time-outs are a go-to for many adults hoping to correct a child’s behaviour, I often hear adults question if the strategy is effective, given that Time-outs commonly result in power struggles and because adults sometimes find themselves sending children on Time-outs multiple times a day or week, for the same behaviours! For this reason, I thought it would be helpful to discuss why Time-outs are not such an effective behaviour modification tool and how the lesser-known strategy of Time-ins can actually revolutionize discipline and be a game-changer for many families.
In the FLOW: Mindfulness for Peace & Joy
I used to try and control life and the people around me, but I eventually came to realize that there really is no reason to get upset if something doesn’t work out as planned or someone doesn’t see things the way I do. I just breathe and watch for what happens next, allow things to fall into place. I can’t count how many times a better circumstance or situation has emerged. The universe synchronizes with my flow and most times it feels like everything just falls perfectly into place.
Once you feel flow, you’re always going to want to stay in flow. Being in flow is so very powerful and essential for attaining a blissful life. When I remain fluid and am in flow, all sorts of opportunities emerge that truly surpass anything I could ever plan for or wish to come true.
Bringing Kindfulness into Back to School Preparation
During these lasts few days and weeks of Summer Break, the realization that change is imminent will inevitably preoccupy the minds of most school age children. Mindfulness can be an invaluable tool to help cultivate resilience, emotional intelligence and awareness— which can help to ease worries as well as support children to navigate the challenges life throws their way with calm, confidence and grace.
Those of you who have some familiarity with Mindfulness and who have experienced its benefits first-hand are likely aware of how it can be helpful to make a smoother transition back to school. But, for those of you who do not have first hand experience, here are some tips on how to establish a Mindfulness practice with your child, so as to help them activate the superpowers required to calm their worries and any other BIG emotions they may be experiencing.
Mindfulness + Mother Nature: How Nature Boosts Joy, Acceptance, Calm and Kindness
Just as a formal mindfulness meditation practices enable us to sooth and nurture our internal systems, so too can connecting with nature. Carving out time to enjoy and be in nature is a simple and effective way to help us feel calm, rejuvenated, happier and more grounded.
A great way to spend time being in and enjoying nature, especially with little ones, is to create mandalas.
Helping Children Thrive while Learning at Home
Navigating the upcoming school year will be easier, for adults and children alike, if adults feel confident in their capacity to not only teach children reading, writing and arithmetic, but to also do what’s best for children’s mental, emotional and social development.
The Language of Feeling
To empower young people to feel in control and have a sense of mastery (confidence) over themselves (inner world) and their life experiences (outer world), we can teach them how to articulate what it is that they are experiencing inside of them, so that they can share it with trusted adults and allow them into their world of meaning (to help or just be with them).
The Principles of Kindfulness
It is easy to take for granted the journey I have travelled to re-wire my brain, actually my entire life, since I began regularly practising Kindfulness a few years ago. It’s usually not until I find myself supporting those who are new to the practice, or in this case, facilitating an online program for busy families who are developing a Kindfulness practise that they can share with their children, that I take a step back to consider the tenets of this life-changing practice.
Should Your Mindfulness Practice be Formal or Informal?
I am often asked about the differences between formal and informal mindfulness practices, more specifically, which one is more beneficial. My answer is hardly an answer, because I respond with the question “What are you hoping to gain from your practice?”
The Kind in Kindfulness
I often get asked about the significance of the Kind in Kindfulness, and needless to say, without the part about being Kind, mindfulness wouldn’t have taken me to this place I am currently at, where I am thriving and truly feel happier, more at peace and more whole than ever before.
My Journey into Kindfulness
After trying every trick you’ve heard of, to naturally deal with nausea, exhaustion and other symptoms of pregnancy, I was surprised to notice how effective mindfulness was at alleviating a lot of the discomfort I was experiencing. The feedback loop ignited by experiencing positive results, with just a few small and easy shifts in my life, was what ultimately inspired the greatest changes in my life.